Asperger's Syndrome Newletter Header Image

Volume 44

Hi, I'm Craig Kendall, the author of The Asperger's Syndrome Survival Guide. In today's issue we will discuss...

Challenges for a Young Adult with Aspergers

The following email is representative of many I get on the challenges with young adults with AS.

Hello,

After doing research online about Asperger's I've noticed that I have shown a lot of the symptoms of this disorder. All through my life into high school I've had extreme trouble making friend. I was usually the kid sitting alone at the playground, while other kids played. This was the same in high school.

While starting a class project I remember sitting by myself unsure on what to do or who's group to join. I have had close friends but are friendship never evolved into anything, because of my inability to make conversations or to play something to do together.

Another problem I had was bullying. I can remember in 7th grade this one kid who was of course bigger then me cornering me in a corner. I didn't know what to do and was so scared that I answered everything he said to me. I was lucky enough to have another boy come over and help me. Even worse I was beat up several times, and never fought back. I didn't feel that it was the right thing to do, or that I needed to defend myself.

When it comes to eye contact I can make eye contact some times, but am literally afraid to look into someone eyes. I cant even look at a persons eyes in a magazine, to where I usually turn the magazine over most of the time.

When it comes to work I have been though over 13 jobs, and never worked longer then 3 months. I felt as I couldn't commit to the job, and didn't wanna wait the several weeks to get paid.

I have trouble with fabrics. When a fabric such as cotton material rubs against my skin I get this electrical feeling through my entire body. I don't even have to touch the fabric. a person beside me can just rub the fabric themselves, and when I hear the sound of there hand rubbing against the fabric my whole body quenches up, and my ears hurt. I also have trouble with loud noises, and bright lights. The kind of lights you would find at a Walmart. They make my eyes burn, and make me feel very tired and thirsty.

Things I obsess over are the Nazi Germany era. I am constantly looking at pictures of Nazi Germany, and Hitler and his SS. My brother gets annoyed how I tell him my opinion on how things could of went.

I also have a good example of my inability to change my routine. I am currently babysitting my aunts friends kids. My parents think it weird of me because I am so committed to babysitting them. Even though they pay me pretty low I am still willing to go to help them. I have trouble dealing with the fact that I might not be helping them anymore if I find work. One question I have for you is why do I seem to get along really good with children more then I do adults? I feel like I can communicate better with children. Why is this?

I have trouble knowing how to do things such as writing a check or organizing some big event. I even have trouble keeping track of my medical bills, or my mail in general. My fathers does every in that matter for me.

I am a 21 year old young man, who doesn't know where else to turn. I know you work with children, but do you offer advice or answers to adults who could have this disorder? I don't know if you care or will reply back, but these problems have ruined my life. I have never been given help for them and I am usually made fun of by my family if I tell them what I am dealing with. I am going no where because of these problem, and haven't had any friends for most of my life. I sit inside everyday, and have no motivation to do anything. If you can help me or give me some advice I would be most grateful.
 

Classic Symptoms

You have the classic symptoms of Asperger's Syndrome. Nearly everything you describe is common for those with they syndrome. The good news is that Aspergers is much more widely recognized today as one of the types of autism. Therefore, help is much more readily available.

Getting Professional Help

I suggest that you seek a professional diagnosis. At that point you can get a therapist who can help you. Normally, people with Aspergers are able to make excellent progress and learn many of the skills necessary to have friends, go on dates, find and KEEP jobs, etc. But you need to find a therapist who is knowledgeable about Aspergers.

Your comment about being able to get along with children than people your own age is very common. What we also see is that many people with Aspergers also get along with people who are much older than themselves. 

You bring up many issues. Many of my past newsletters have touched on these so I will list several of my past newsletters here to help you.

Answers from my Past Newsletters

1. What is Asperger's syndrome?

4. What are the signs of Aspergers?

7. What steps should I take to see if I or my loved one has Aspergers?

8. Why does it often take years to diagnose Aspergerís Syndrome?

9. How can I get a diagnosis of Aspergers for an Adult?

11. What are the most effective ways to treat Aspergers?

12. How can I help my loved one who has overly sensitive hearing?

13. What treatments help with sensitivity to touch or having problems with the feeling of clothing?

15. My Aspergers loved one has terrible social skills. What should I do?

16. My Aspergers teenager is depressed because he is not making friends. What treatments can help?

22. An Aspergers Adult Who Was Diagnosed at Age 24 and His Struggles to Learn Social Skills

34. Dating, Puberty and Your AS Teen

39. What causes depression in people with Aspergers?

40. Aspergers Support Resources

41. Answers to Common Questions about Adults with AS
 

Note: my newly released book on Aspergers for Teens and Young Adults discusses bullying, anxiety, depression and what to do about it. Click here for more information:

www.aspergerssociety.org/teen_book.htm

 

Note: my newly released book on Aspergers for Adults discusses how to make and keep friends, building relationships, employment, depression and the meaning of life, therapy options and much more. Click here for more information:

www.aspergerssociety.org/adult_book.htm

This is just a small part of the answers you will need to successfully survive and thrive with Aspergers. If you are looking for additional information immediately, go to the following site: www.AspergersSociety.org.
 



 

The Asperger's Syndrome Survival Guide Book Image

For additional information on Asperger's Syndrome go to the web site  www.AspergersSociety.org. There you will be able to sign up for the free Aspergers newsletter as well as get additional information on the book, The Asperger's Syndrome Survival Guide.

Craig Kendall is the father of an Asperger's child and the author of "The Asperger's Syndrome Survival Guide". You can find more information about living with Asperger's Syndrome by contacting him on this site: www.AspergersSociety.org

 

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Thank you,

Craig Kendall, Author